THE FIRST DAY OF A NEW ERA

the first day since of letting go. same feeling inside me, that happy yet so so sad feeling. i' ma walkin contradiction.

woke up to go church today. though i did'nt go for altar call, i really felt that the message spoke out to me, especially since it was just a few hours after i had decided to let go. it was based on the book of James. and James 1:12 was used, my favourite verse. as i sat through the sermon, i felt that God had really planned the message for me. it was about God's commitment to us, how he would never leave our side inspite of whatever circumstance and that even through the hard times, God makes sure we come out better. mistakes are like God's training grounds for us. i'll say it again, the meassage really spoke out to me. and it was like a could feel God there telling me that, "this message is for you. you don't have to feel sad cause i'm here. and will always be". really touched, i did'nt cry or anything, but for the first time in my life, i really felt the grace of God. worship also spoke out to me. the songs were really meaningful. all in all, it was a great word today. the first i had attended in 6 months. i feel so sercure now, cause i know i'm in his loving arms.

came home, ate then went out. played when we were supposed to do homework. don't know how i'm gonna live through tommorow. i think it's up to God. i'll place my trust in him.
oh well, gotta go. gonna play one last match of dota before i delete it from my com. serious time.


praise the lord with all my heart, praise him for he has done great things. his banner over me is love, his love. his banner over me is love, his love.